Why Not Do It, Sir, Today?

“Why so I will, you noisy bird,
This very day I’ll advertise you,
Perhaps some busy ones may prize you.
A fine-tongued parrot as was ever heard,
I’ll word it thus–set forth all charms about you,
And say no family should be without you.”

Thus far a gentleman addressed a bird,
Then to his friend: “An old procrastinator,
Sir, I am: do you wonder that I hate her?
Though she but seven words can say,
Twenty and twenty times a day
She interferes with all my dreams,
My projects, plans, and airy schemes,
Mocking my foible to my sorrow:
I’ll advertise this bird to-morrow.”

To this the bird seven words did say:
“Why not do it, sir, to-day?”